How to Give Your Personal Reference Instead of Commands

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Oliver Sin

Forbes says, “If you have an opinion, say it firmly. Own your thought.” Leaders that take ownership of their own opinions and thoughts build confidence in themselves. And that self-confidence and security show you’re not easily influenced or manipulated.

Reflect on how to give your personal reference instead of commands

Learning how to give your personal reference instead of commands is fundamental in developing and honing your leadership skills. Start by simply taking a moment to reflect.

How do you enforce strong opinions that should be loosely held?

Exercises to help you give your personal reference instead of commands

Now, it's time to put your reflection into action. Finding opportunities to implement your leadership skills can allow you to give your personal reference instead of commands.

  • Communicate respectfully when giving your opinion. When you’re about to share your thoughts, say: “I believe…” or “I think…” followed with, “And here’s why…”
  • Emphasize that you’re a resource to your team. While you’re available to give advice, opinions, thoughts, let your team know they can be loosely held.  
  • Share your views by grounding them with facts. Consider: “I suggest we pursue the second plan based on last year's experiment, but this is your project. It's your call.”
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